Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Open now for discussion of all things Darlo!

Moderators: mikkyx, uncovered

User avatar
theoriginalfatcat
Posts: 6718
Joined: Wed Jul 15, 2009 7:40 pm
Team Supported: Darlington

Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by theoriginalfatcat » Sun Feb 23, 2014 7:26 pm

Here we go - using my incredibly powerful memory and Wikepedia I have compiled a team sheet to give you all nightmares - formation 424 (midfielders anyone?) ..... with these guys up front :thumbdown:


GK Jamie Speare

DEF Big Ex (not a bad player,attitude adjustment needed)
Lehit Zeghdane
Domonik Werling (didn't play a single game before he "did one")
Clayton Fortune

MF Simon Davey (See Big Ex)
Gary Dempsey

ATT Paul Beavers (I remember well his one goal)
Ton Kaak
Noel Whelan
Patrick Deane

Would this team beat R.A. ?
Profile pic ↗️
Feethams the Panda. 28 Jan 2012.
Now extinct!

Yackley_Quaker
Posts: 338
Joined: Thu Jul 09, 2009 10:13 pm
Team Supported: Darlington

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by Yackley_Quaker » Sun Feb 23, 2014 8:09 pm

What a wealth of dross there is to pick from !! You must have been fortunate enough to miss the Ashlee Jones debut in the 4-0 drubbing at Notts County otherwise you'd have had him between the sticks. Funnily enough his first appearance was also his last as he never played for us again ! God knows who told him he was a goalkeeper but they obviously lied.
I would also find it hard to leave Darlo's Little and Large Clint Marcelle and Steve McMahon out of the team (the actual Little and Large couldn't have done any worse !!), though Im sure everyone else has their own personal "favourites".

fat tony
Posts: 3403
Joined: Thu Jul 09, 2009 8:55 pm
Team Supported: Darlington

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by fat tony » Sun Feb 23, 2014 9:07 pm

For me you've really got to exclude the 09/10 relegation season from this list otherwise all the pub players Staunton and Todd turned-out end up dominating every position. In goal alone you've got to Ashlee Jones, Liversedge and David Knight. Up front take your pick from Noel Whelan, Kevin Gall, Paddy Deane and Mor Diop. Full backs; Rikki Baines, Tony Kane etc. etc.

A lot of that squad really should have been dragged outside the stadium and shot for crimes against football - I'd like to think if we were a fan-owned club back then we would have done the decent thing.

As well as the above, Terry McDermott's son (Liam? Neil?) who was on loan with us in the mid-noughties would be first on the team sheet. Worst player I've ever seen at any level of any sport.

Jonesy
Posts: 152
Joined: Thu Jul 22, 2010 4:23 pm
Team Supported: Darlington

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by Jonesy » Sun Feb 23, 2014 9:27 pm

Worst player I have seen is Drewe Broughton :shock:

lo36789
Posts: 10931
Joined: Wed Apr 27, 2011 10:58 pm
Team Supported: Darlington

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by lo36789 » Sun Feb 23, 2014 9:52 pm

Jonesy wrote:Worst player I have seen is Drewe Broughton :shock:
Nowhere near the worst player to pull on a Darlo shirt sorry.

The weird thing with Lehit Zeghdane, I remember watching him in a friendly where he played up front and he looked half decent.

The players that stand out more for me are the ones who came with decent reputations. Bobby Petta, Clint Marcelle, Seb Carole are a few off the top of my head. They are probably better than some of the others but they were so disappointing.

My two nominations would be Fabien Bossy & Richard Offiong.

quaker4life
Posts: 2786
Joined: Thu Jul 09, 2009 9:24 pm
Team Supported: Darlington
Contact:

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by quaker4life » Sun Feb 23, 2014 10:17 pm

fat tony wrote:For me you've really got to exclude the 09/10 relegation season from this list otherwise all the pub players Staunton and Todd turned-out end up dominating every position.
This ^

2009/10 was an exceptional case (and an exceptionally terrible excuse of a football team) Todd assembled a team of cast offs on gentlemans agreements and Staunton subsquently replaced them with more garbage imported from Ireland.

Although I do have to say Moar Diop was an utter plank, thankfully I only had the misfortune of witnessing him twice away at Bradford and at home to Lincoln (although he did score that night).

Clint Marcelle & Tom "does what it says on the tin" Kaak are definitely top of my list.

I remember Bertrand Bossu, the lanky french goalkeeper from 2005/06 being rather dodgy at times. Matt Clarke, Glenn Robson, Fabien Bossy, Craig Russell (second time), Jonjo Dickman, Craig James (second time), Darren Holloway & Kalu Ngoma would be up there as well.

Although to be fair to Matt Clarke he was usually a steady centre half but tended to be clumsy I remember him dropping a couple of clangers, particularly in the home game against Bury in 2004/05 which resulted in them scoring.

If I had to pick a worst ever player excluding the 2009/10 team it would have to be Glenn Robson, came to us in the first season at the Arena and only played a handful of games for us but I can't recall him having a good game in any of them!
love it! wrote:Considering we are Darlington 1883 I'm happy that we are named correctly

User avatar
Hilly
Posts: 6250
Joined: Thu Jul 09, 2009 9:07 pm
Team Supported: Darlington

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by Hilly » Sun Feb 23, 2014 11:14 pm

lo36789 wrote:
Jonesy wrote:Worst player I have seen is Drewe Broughton :shock:
Nowhere near the worst player to pull on a Darlo shirt sorry.

The weird thing with Lehit Zeghdane, I remember watching him in a friendly where he played up front and he looked half decent.

The players that stand out more for me are the ones who came with decent reputations. Bobby Petta, Clint Marcelle, Seb Carole are a few off the top of my head. They are probably better than some of the others but they were so disappointing.

My two nominations would be Fabien Bossy & Richard Offiong.
I thought Bobby Petta was quite decent. Certainly not worth mentioning in the same breath as the others you mentioned.

Scored some crackers, one away at Bury sticks in my mind.

Sent from my HTC One using Tapatalk

dickdarlington
Posts: 1476
Joined: Mon Jul 13, 2009 12:12 pm
Team Supported: Darlington

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by dickdarlington » Sun Feb 23, 2014 11:53 pm

Kirk Jackson

Rui Neves

Glen Robson

Budgie Burridge

There's a few to start. We're going to have a very long list.


I want to add Dean Windass to the list. But his previous career probably gives him a reprieve.

Bernie Rhodes knows
Posts: 63
Joined: Fri May 10, 2013 10:17 pm
Team Supported: Darlington

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by Bernie Rhodes knows » Sun Feb 23, 2014 11:57 pm

Clive Nattrass attempts to help with goalie catching practice in the 70's used to end with us retrieving the balls from the Tin Shed with the keepers gloves very clean prior to kick off!!
Steve Holbrook was headless chicken-like, Alec Smith at full back anyone?
Dave McCgaughtrie or however you spell his name was a Dave (Shitty Useless Twat)Booth man.
Gary Chapman- see Holbrook!
In a cracking promotion winning side did anyone really rate Paul Emson?
Mark Barnard-crap, one goal in the fog at The Riverside does not a footballer make
From our Arena days Craig James defied the Trade Descriptions Act as a professional footballer
Fuck we've had some Shite!!

Darlogramps
Posts: 6025
Joined: Sun Sep 05, 2010 10:47 am
Team Supported: Darlington

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by Darlogramps » Mon Feb 24, 2014 12:18 am

lo36789 wrote:
Jonesy wrote:Worst player I have seen is Drewe Broughton :shock:
Nowhere near the worst player to pull on a Darlo shirt sorry.

My two nominations would be Fabien Bossy & Richard Offiong.
We've had this debate many times, and Broughton is right up there. He was awful. A donkey masquerading as a footballer.

With regards Offiong, yes his second spell was terrible I agree, but he had a loan spell around 2002/03 I believe, and didn't do too badly from memory.

Nialle Rodney, Xavier Barrau and Adam Proudlock should be in there IMO.
If ever you're bored or miserable:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZlZohZoadGY

MikeinBlack2
Posts: 1747
Joined: Mon Mar 11, 2013 11:42 am
Team Supported: Darlington
Location: Stockton-on-Tees

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by MikeinBlack2 » Mon Feb 24, 2014 8:01 am

What about that Norwegian defender we had, was it Villassen or something?
Come on Darlo!
Smoke me a kipper....I'll be back for breakfast!

lo36789
Posts: 10931
Joined: Wed Apr 27, 2011 10:58 pm
Team Supported: Darlington

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by lo36789 » Mon Feb 24, 2014 8:53 am

Darlogramps wrote:With regards Offiong, yes his second spell was terrible I agree, but he had a loan spell around 2002/03 I believe, and didn't do too badly from memory.
Aye that is probably his saving grace. I think he was decent for his first couple of games then got lazy and decided he didn't have to try anymore.
Hilly wrote:I thought Bobby Petta was quite decent. Certainly not worth mentioning in the same breath as the others you mentioned.
As I say I think it was more the disappointment. I was there for his goal against Bury but I don't remember him doing a great deal else, he obviously had talent but kind of similar to Offiong's loan spell didn't seem that interested.

Kirk Jackson is a good shout. James Walshaw was also pretty poor in competitive fixtures, maybe he is more worthy of the accolade of players who spent most time on the floor.

Who was that absolute oaf that we signed from Kettering. Quinn, apparantely had a good debut but every game I saw him in he was hopeless.

Does anyone remember Aaron Brown's debut? I'd have put him down as a cert for this list if you had asked me after that game!

comeondarlo
Posts: 2801
Joined: Fri Jul 10, 2009 7:54 am
Team Supported: Darlington
Location: A Swimming Pool (usually).

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by comeondarlo » Mon Feb 24, 2014 9:29 am

Surely Steve McMahon makes this team.

Very tall centre forward, who couldn't jump!

User avatar
Spyman
Posts: 12644
Joined: Thu Jul 09, 2009 10:04 pm
Team Supported: Darlington

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by Spyman » Mon Feb 24, 2014 9:31 am

Some people are mixing up truly terrible players with players that either didn't live up to their billing, or simply didn't stay around very long.

Whoever mentioned Matt Clarke, who was a mainstay of a pretty reasonable League 2 defence for several seasons, is quite frankly clueless.
On Sunday April 29, 2012 at 10:25 pm, Darlo Cockney wrote:Sadly some people have nothing better to do that invent rumours.

We will be playing at the arena again next season - fact.

Quakerz - if you actually attended games and spoke to people you might actually find our facts, rather than spreading s*** on this board.

DC

User avatar
davidcorks 40yard OG
Posts: 1119
Joined: Tue Mar 27, 2012 4:44 pm
Team Supported: Darlington

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by davidcorks 40yard OG » Mon Feb 24, 2014 9:38 am

Bernie Rhodes knows wrote:Clive Nattrass attempts to help with goalie catching practice in the 70's used to end with us retrieving the balls from the Tin Shed with the keepers gloves very clean prior to kick off!!
Steve Holbrook was headless chicken-like, Alec Smith at full back anyone?
Dave McCgaughtrie or however you spell his name was a Dave (Shitty Useless Twat)Booth man.
Gary Chapman- see Holbrook!
In a cracking promotion winning side did anyone really rate Paul Emson?
Mark Barnard-crap, one goal in the fog at The Riverside does not a footballer make
From our Arena days Craig James defied the Trade Descriptions Act as a professional footballer
Fuck we've had some Shite!!

Give ya head a shake ffs , not the best 3 players we've ever had but far far far from being amongst the worst :roll:

Dave Mcgaughtrie on the other hand was utter s*** along with these other jokers from the late 80s early 90s Jeremy oops Roberts ,Dave Shearer ,Paul Clayton,Dave fatboy Moore & Bernie Slaven
Image

BaronsCourtQuaker
Posts: 767
Joined: Tue Sep 28, 2010 12:52 pm
Team Supported: Darlington

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by BaronsCourtQuaker » Mon Feb 24, 2014 9:53 am

Im not sure I ever saw him play, but if i did I don't much remember. However Scott Wiseman who I don't think was too highly rated will be pitting himself against the likes of Schweinsteiger, Ozil, Mueller and co for Gibraltar v Germany

comeondarlo
Posts: 2801
Joined: Fri Jul 10, 2009 7:54 am
Team Supported: Darlington
Location: A Swimming Pool (usually).

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by comeondarlo » Mon Feb 24, 2014 10:22 am

Spyman wrote:Some people are mixing up truly terrible players with players that either didn't live up to their billing, or simply didn't stay around very long.

Whoever mentioned Matt Clarke, who was a mainstay of a pretty reasonable League 2 defence for several seasons, is quite frankly clueless.
I know, unbelievable!!!
It was quaker4life btw.

User avatar
Spyman
Posts: 12644
Joined: Thu Jul 09, 2009 10:04 pm
Team Supported: Darlington

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by Spyman » Mon Feb 24, 2014 12:30 pm

To be honest, if we had to pick the 'worst ever Darlington line-up' based on footballing ability, fitness etc, there'd probably be some of this season and last season's line-up included given the level we're playing at. I bet a number of those in this list would look like superstars in the Northern League.

Oh, and another ridiculous selection - Clayton Fortune. Again, no world beater but was played out of position in a pretty decent defence.
On Sunday April 29, 2012 at 10:25 pm, Darlo Cockney wrote:Sadly some people have nothing better to do that invent rumours.

We will be playing at the arena again next season - fact.

Quakerz - if you actually attended games and spoke to people you might actually find our facts, rather than spreading s*** on this board.

DC

spen666
Posts: 2296
Joined: Tue Jul 03, 2012 9:12 pm
Team Supported: Darlington

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by spen666 » Mon Feb 24, 2014 12:44 pm

Jonesy wrote:Worst player I have seen is Drewe Broughton :shock:
He must hold the record for playing for most clubs relegated out of league in season he played for them.

spen666
Posts: 2296
Joined: Tue Jul 03, 2012 9:12 pm
Team Supported: Darlington

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by spen666 » Mon Feb 24, 2014 12:45 pm

Spyman wrote:To be honest, if we had to pick the 'worst ever Darlington line-up' based on footballing ability, fitness etc, there'd probably be some of this season and last season's line-up included given the level we're playing at. I bet a number of those in this list would look like superstars in the Northern League.

Oh, and another ridiculous selection - Clayton Fortune. Again, no world beater but was played out of position in a pretty decent defence.

I was thinking that.

Its more a lack of living up to expectation, and a lack of effort or application

User avatar
RUMPLESTILTSKIN
Posts: 1688
Joined: Fri Jul 10, 2009 1:57 pm
Team Supported: Darlington
Location: In my own little world

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by RUMPLESTILTSKIN » Mon Feb 24, 2014 12:45 pm

dickdarlington wrote:Kirk Jackson

Rui Neves

Glen Robson

Budgie Burridge

There's a few to start. We're going to have a very long list.


I want to add Dean Windass to the list. But his previous career probably gives him a reprieve.

How does a prevous career stop him from being in DARLO's worst ever side?
In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is King

PierremontQuaker03
Posts: 2178
Joined: Sun Jul 19, 2009 11:53 am
Team Supported: Darlington

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by PierremontQuaker03 » Mon Feb 24, 2014 12:49 pm

The worrying thing about some of the names mentioned is that these were players from higher division clubs, even Premier League (Dickman, Offiong)- I could understand if we had taken a punt on a player from Poole Town for example, and that player turning out to be crap - but these two players I have mentioned would have came thru decent academies - and they were absolute dross.
Just to add some names to the mix -
Jean Michel Cau - 1 appearance from the bench that was it
Neil Teggart - could not hit a barn door
Ian Harty - strange this one - if my memory serves me right started the season and then just disappeared and ended up back in Scotland
Noel Whelan - always injured
and of course could not leave out....
Bernie Slaven!
“If you can't hit a driver, don't.”
Greg Norman

dickdarlington
Posts: 1476
Joined: Mon Jul 13, 2009 12:12 pm
Team Supported: Darlington

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by dickdarlington » Mon Feb 24, 2014 12:58 pm

Rumplestiltskin: The same reason that Slavin hasn't been mentioned.

I'd like to throw a few more into the mix

Anthony Griffith - Seems to have done well at Port Vale. But did nothing for us
Simon Johnson - I think the technical term is "Gash"
Guy Bates - words failed me
Lee Brydon - Never got him. Others thought he was decent.
David Poole - Too small. No touch. Couldn't pass.
Matt Green - Can we even call him a footballer?
Carl Pepper - Woeful
Jose Quitongo - mentioned by a colleague. But he must have been so pants I can't remember him.

John Williams is exempt because i vaguely remember his scoring a couple.

Spyman: I think the whole of the current generation are exempt from this because they are all (for the most part) exceptional for the level they are playing at. Had they been higher up, they might have been in the list. Shaun Reay for example wasn't very good first time around. But briefly in his second spell at NL level was unstoppable. Saying that, didn't we have a lad called Grieve playing centre half against Guisborough last season? But that might have just been an off day, and he never got his chance again.

dickdarlington
Posts: 1476
Joined: Mon Jul 13, 2009 12:12 pm
Team Supported: Darlington

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by dickdarlington » Mon Feb 24, 2014 1:01 pm

Slaven has now been mentioned. Ha.

For my sins, I always thought that Jonjo was alright. Nothing special, but worked hard in the middle. Plus I think it was him who scored that wonder bicycle kick on the last day of the season (v Cheltenham I think).

The Golden Hairclip
Posts: 321
Joined: Thu May 03, 2012 7:45 pm
Team Supported: Darlington

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by The Golden Hairclip » Mon Feb 24, 2014 1:25 pm

How about this for a team:-

GK - Nick Liversedge

RB - Rikki Baines
CB - Lewis Hardman
LB - Joe Kendrick

RM - Ross Chisholm
CM - Chris Lumsdon
CM - Neale McDermott
LM - Jeff Smith

RF - Paul Beavers
CF - Paddy Deane
LF - Jefferson Louis

lo36789
Posts: 10931
Joined: Wed Apr 27, 2011 10:58 pm
Team Supported: Darlington

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by lo36789 » Mon Feb 24, 2014 1:26 pm

Spyman you are right it is all relative. We all know how good Dowson was in his first spell with us for instance!

There are a couple of other players. One I can't even remember his name the guy that we signed from Stockport with David Poole - I seem to remember they were both terrible.

I remember John Williams being awful, but I think that was influenced because he followed the likes of Dorner/Roberts & Gabbiadini. Varying levels of ability in those players but they were all decent to watch, am I imagining that at one point we had the ever so mobile Williams & Conlon pairing up top in the Gary Bennett season at Feethams?

Simon Johnson/Mark Barnard/Lee Brydon these were all Division 3/League Two standard players. They weren't world beaters but they certainly weren't terrible.

Nathan Porritt, Jeff Smith and David Knight were another 3 of my worst (thanks Boro!).

AndyPark
Posts: 12155
Joined: Sat Jul 25, 2009 3:08 pm
Team Supported: Darlington
Location: Darlington

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by AndyPark » Mon Feb 24, 2014 1:41 pm

The Golden Hairclip wrote:How about this for a team:-

GK - Nick Liversedge

RB - Rikki Baines
CB - Lewis Hardman
LB - Joe Kendrick

RM - Ross Chisholm
CM - Chris Lumsdon
CM - Neale McDermott
LM - Jeff Smith

RF - Paul Beavers
CF - Paddy Deane
LF - Jefferson Louis
Only memory I have of Jefferson Louis, is the missed penalty away to AFC Wimbledon.
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Ti6DPQQpyqE

quaker4life
Posts: 2786
Joined: Thu Jul 09, 2009 9:24 pm
Team Supported: Darlington
Contact:

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by quaker4life » Mon Feb 24, 2014 1:42 pm

comeondarlo wrote:
I know, unbelievable!!!
It was quaker4life btw.[/quote]

Obviously didn't read the whole of the post.
Although to be fair to Matt Clarke he was usually a steady centre half but tended to be clumsy I remember him dropping a couple of clangers, particularly in the home game against Bury in 2004/05 which resulted in them scoring.
Although conveniently to be fair I believe the above poster does have a selective memory and conveniently would remember this particular detail.
love it! wrote:Considering we are Darlington 1883 I'm happy that we are named correctly

Quakerz
Posts: 20958
Joined: Sat Jul 11, 2009 6:32 pm
Team Supported: Darlington

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by Quakerz » Mon Feb 24, 2014 2:32 pm

You had no business putting Matt Clarke in there, even if you said "to be fair he was decent but...", because the list is for players who were nothing like. Clarke did a very decent job for us over a number of seasons.

The person who mentioned Gary Dempsey...I didn't think he was that bad.

And Jose Quitongo only played for us once, had a blinder and was sold to Hamilton (I think) for 75k (I think)...think that's the story with him anyway, he certainly wasn't crap.

For me, you have the goalkeepers - Bertie (fucking) Bossu, Keith Finch, Nick (corner might as well be a penner) Liversedge, Jeremy Roberts and David Knight all fighting it out for the coveted number one spot.

Defenders - Dave Moore, Dave McAughtrie, Ville Vaisanen, Craig James, Billy Runwell, all defenders from the 09/10 horror season

Midfielders - Fabien Bossy, Jeff (fucking) Smith, oh I've actually lost the will to think of any more...
Image

“Everybody knows where that club is going now, so I’m out of the way. They can carry on, it’s their club, they can keep it." - Raj Singh, 2017

User avatar
Spyman
Posts: 12644
Joined: Thu Jul 09, 2009 10:04 pm
Team Supported: Darlington

Re: Is this the worst ever Darlo team line up ?

Post by Spyman » Mon Feb 24, 2014 2:34 pm

I read your whole post. Why did you bring his name up in a discussion about the worst ever Darlo players?

I could list hundreds of ex-Darlo players who made mistakes in games that cost us goals. On no level does this make them relevent to this discussion.
On Sunday April 29, 2012 at 10:25 pm, Darlo Cockney wrote:Sadly some people have nothing better to do that invent rumours.

We will be playing at the arena again next season - fact.

Quakerz - if you actually attended games and spoke to people you might actually find our facts, rather than spreading s*** on this board.

DC

Post Reply